prepare for a godly marriage | pursue relationship with Jesus | build a foundation for a Kingdom-advancing life
Wow. Have you heard the story of Ian and Larissa Murphy? These two demonstrate unconditional love in marriage. When Ian’s brain was damaged in a life-altering automobile accident, his then-girlfriend, Larissa, didn’t give up. Watch their update here:
[vimeo 88485530 w=500 h=281]
If you are interested to read their book or learn more about their story, visit their website here.
What is the first thing you do to get ready for your shower? Well, you need to take off all your clothes. Ok, before you think I’m a crazy Californian wanting to talk about getting naked during a short devotional message, just bear with me. We’re actually going to talk about taking a spiritual shower. I felt so grateful to be asked to share this message a couple of months ago at a Ladies Luncheon at my church. The community here in Arkansas has welcomed my husband and me with such warmth and we’re glad to be here.
Regardless of where you are and at what life stage you are in right now, I hope this brief devotional refreshes and challenges you. Every time you take a shower, you can be reminded that our heart needs a good wash too!
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljAa9e_WYi8&w=560&h=315]
Key Points to Remember:
“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”
“Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your
salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.”
“Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.“
At home:
“…those of you who are single, particularly single women, have six options: sin, surrender, settle, suffer, strive, or solace. If you’re single and struggling with your singleness, know that the Jesus that you’re talking to is a Jesus who understands.”
Pastor Mark Driscoll addresses the reality of the paths before you as a single adult. As Beautiful Bricklayers, we hope you would be proactive in your preparation for marriage without idolizing the idea of marriage.
Watch the full sermon: http://jesus.to/1fzL4zR
Find out more about the Malachi sermon series:http://marshill.com/malachi
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPX_VkCFDD4&w=560&h=315]
Check in tomorrow for more prayer prompts to close out the 31 Day Husband Prayer Journey (although, we hope you continue praying beyond these 31 days!). Also, get ready for Monday’s post when
you’ll hear an audio message Cristina Alexandroni shared recently at a Ladies Luncheon in Arkansas.
Happy Spring! Coming out of the super cold winter we had this year, I couldn’t be happier to embrace springtime!
To launch this new season, we are announcing a month-long opportunity. Many of you have expressed a desire to get serious about praying for that special man that will be (or is already) your husband.
I went for years praying here and there for Mr. Cristina, but it wasn’t until about 6 months before I met my husband that I actually took the step to get fervent, persistent, and consistent in my conversations with God about this man who I did not yet know. Whether you are in the same place I was when I started (totally single) or you are dating or engaged – you can still pray daily for your husband. Hopefully, this will be a life-giving discipline that continues after marriage. I will be taking this challenge along with you! There’s always more to bring to God in prayer!
The “Husband Prayer Journey” is a 31-day challenge designed to help you pray a little (or a lot) every day for your life partner (present or future husband). This adventure will help you become disciplined, get better aligned with God’s heart, and ultimately grow as a woman who loves Jesus!
Ready to get this party started?
Guidelines:
yourself!
Here’s the plan:
Every Friday we will post prayer prompts for the following week. Feel free to use these as launching pads for your daily prayer or comment on these posts to add your own! So are you in?! Grab your Bible, journal, maybe even a trusted girlfriend or mentor, and get started!
“This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.”
1 John 5:14-15
Happy belated Valentine’s Day! Although we’ve been a little quiet around here for awhile, we’re getting some posts written to give you some updates. In the meanwhile, here’s an excellent video worth watching for single, dating, engaged, and married alike.
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bF_5wbmrEsc&w=560&h=315]
Every day we sit down at the table of our lives. 24 hours tick by moment by moment and we decide what we’re going to feast on: the people we allow into our lives, the influences we let in, the voices we listen to, what we commit our energy to, and on the list goes.
When you wake up, are you intentional throughout your day about seeking God and listening to His voice or are you in reaction mode since the time the alarm goes off till it’s time to crawl under the covers again? Or do you see yourself as a steward of the resources God’s entrusted to you? Do you recognize that every moment is a gift?
When you go through your day, how do you interact with the people around you? The ones who are sitting across from you in your day to day life: family, friends, co-workers, roommates, significant others? Is your conversation meaningful and edifying? Or are you just “shooting the breeze” on a regular basis? What would happen if you weren’t “at their table” anymore? Let’s say you got a new job or moved to a new house and your routine changed. How would they remember you? What would they have learned from you or missed about you?
Let’s make an intentional effort today to be a blessing to those “sitting at our tables.”
What about dessert? How do you reward yourself in life? What are some ways you seek comfort or consolation for life’s daily stressors? Are they healthy, productive, God-honoring incentives? Are there any destructive outlets that you run to for solace?
Always remember:
The name of the Lord is a fortified tower;
the righteous run to it and are safe.
Proverbs 18:10, NIV
You might have noticed that I haven’t been blogging much during the month of October, and, for my distance, I want to apologize. To be perfectly honest, I’ve had a challenging month and I went into a bit of a hibernation. I plan to tell you about it more later, but in the meanwhile I gladly welcome November!!! We will be focusing on the theme of “GRATITUDE” this month as we prepare our hearts for that beloved day that many associate with turkey, football, second helpings, colorful leaves, and warm drinks: Thanksgiving.
I don’t know about you, but I am overjoyed to dive into the holiday season. Last year, my husband and I decided to take things very slow and even “undercommit” during Thanksgiving and Christmas. I am so grateful that we spent our first married holiday season that way so that we could savor every moment and truly wrap our hearts around the meaning of each celebration. It was as though we were enjoying a twelve course meal over a long evening and able to delight in every bite… simply because we made a decision to be deliberate about remembering the purpose.
This is my prayer for you over the next two months as we celebrate Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s: Jesus, we thank you for your love that is exquisite and spectacular – far better than anything else we could ever experience or desire. Thank you for lavishing on us your grace, kindness, and faithfulness, even when we are not aware of your generosity. Please help us to wholeheartedly engage with you during this season of celebration. Please give us an acute awareness of your presence no matter what we have going on over the next couple of months. Help us to choose you… every day. We love you, Lord!
Every month we have a friendly reminder that we were created female. Our menstrual cycle is obviously much more than just an inconvenience to manage. It’s an indication that we are, one day, likely going to be able to carry a new little life inside. Start thinking about your fertility now – even if you are single and not even dating anyone.
I remember being in a mentorship group of women who gathered every month to learn about different aspects of what it meant to be a woman. One of the questions we came upon was about birth control and determining which methods were healthy and honoring to God. Most of us in that group twenty-somethings were 100% single at the time, but we were determined to learn more about a subject we had hardly ever heard about from our Christian leaders.
Through research in books and online, I have come to the conclusion that using the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) or Natural Family Planning (NFP) is best for me.
To put it very simply: I started tracking my cycles before I got married. More than circling the start and end dates of my period on a calendar (I DO NOT recommend the calendar or rhythm method!!!), I tracked two fertility signs every day. I recorded my Basal Body Temperature (BBT) upon waking and observed my cervical fluid (or mucus) throughout the day. The purpose of tracking these signs helped me to become “body literate” and aware of when I was fertile and when I was not.
In marriage, my husband adopted the role of “NFP record taker” so that he is involved and aware of what’s happening in my body. It’s been a wonderfully unifying experience and we don’t have to worry about unwelcome side effects that can happen when taking “the pill”. There are many articles and papers written about the oral contraceptive controversy, but you can look in to that further for yourself.
Both books pictured above are books that were helpful for me to learn NFP. Many people believe myths that NFP is too difficult, that it is not effective, and that it is unromantic. I have found that although it takes intentionality to learn, it is well worth the effort. It has been extremely effective for us and those who use it conscientiously. Also, it’s been very romantic to have my husband interested and aware of what is going on in my body and I love having a teammate in this sphere.
I have listed below some additional resources that offer helpful information. Be mindful that they are not all “Christian” websites and carry various worldviews. It’s important to read this with a discerning mind.
Women’s Health & Fertility
This month, Melissa Pena, recommends Gary Thomas’ Every Body Matters to help us dive deeper into the health theme. She shares more of a summary below so you can be further inspired to worship God with your whole being… including your body.
Every Body Matters Book Review
While the world around pushes for us to lose weight and look our best in healthy and unhealthy ways, the church often opts out of conversations about physical health and well being altogether. Gary Thomas addresses this trend and dives right into the discussion in his book, Every Body Matters. Here, Thomas explores from a Biblical perspective the benefits of physical fitness and how it can profoundly impact our lives as Christ followers. He shares how becoming physically fit can lead to being more sensitive to God’s voice, having more zest for life, and having a fresh attitude of service and love for others.
In addition to discussing the spiritual and emotional benefits of physical fitness, Gary Thomas also shares the true motivation behind all of it. The goal behind getting healthy as a Christian is not that we might look and feel great but that we might be “instruments for special purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work” (2 Timothy 2:21). By being disciplined in what we eat and the activities we choose, we train ourselves so that we might be ready (now both physically, mentally, and spiritually) for any good work- for Christ and His kingdom.
I am so grateful to have read this book and very highly recommend it. Every chapter is infused with convicting truth, motivating perspective, and refreshing candor. Every time I put the book down, I felt this deep urge to go for a brisk walk or do some sort of exercise. This book has given me a deeper motivation for being healthy. It’s not about me just getting thinner and more agile but it’s about walking with my God and serving Him with all my heart. For me, that’s just about the best motivation I could ever ask for. I hope you find this book as refreshing and motivating as I did. Press on, sisters!
“Soft people who frequently complain about the smallest annoyances, who give in to laziness and excess, who expect others to work so they can rest, who collapse into passive entertainment instead of active exercise- these are souls custom-made to become all but irrelevant in kingdom warfare. They are no threat to anyone- least of all to Satan.” pg. 127
Something that helps me clear my mind and nourish my soul is to keep three special appointments each week: a business meeting, a fun date, and a time to spiritually recharge. This is not my original idea, but I heard it on a Focus on the Family radio broadcast featuring an older couple talking about their secret to a strong, healthy marriage through the years.
Keeping these appointments would be beneficial to everyone at all stages of life: single, dating, engaged, or married! Here’s my version of that older couple’s idea and how try to integrate it into my weekly routine.
Business Meeting: Every Tuesday night, my husband and I have a time to connect about the logistics of our lives. This is a simple version of our agenda: Prayer, Recite out loud our family vision statement, Review: finances, calendar, social and ministry happenings, goals, old and new projects, and we even have a little point system that helps us with motivation (If you are interested, I’ll post a video about our point system below). Prior to our meeting, I update our books, and make a new agenda for the meeting. Yes, I know it sounds totally stale and, well, business-like, but it’s such a freeing thing for us to do in order to stay on the same page and not feel like our lives are out of control. If you are single, this is such a great way to keep short accounts with yourself and your own schedule, goals, and finances. Having your own business meeting is an excellent habit to get into now that will yield great dividends in the long run.
Date Night: Hanging out and having fun probably seems like a “no-brainer” easy thing to do when you are married, dating 
or engaged, but I want to encourage those of you who are single to have date nights too. When I was single (and was not even getting asked out very often), I would make an effort to get dressed up (heels, makeup, hair, and all) and go to a quaint cafe or oceanside restaurant with my bible and journal and I would call it a God-date. Seriously, I had so much fun and I really felt my worth and my beauty. Even though I usually ordered only a dessert and some tea (I had a tight budget), I engaged with the Lord through the experience. Other times, I would bundle up for a sunset walk along the beach. I listened for the Holy Spirit’s voice to tell me what He thought of me, to confide in me whatever He wanted to say, and I can honestly say that those dates were some of the sweetest ones I’ve
ever had in my life! Just because you don’t have a “significant other” in your life doesn’t mean you don’t get to go on crazy-awesome dates.
Spiritual Recharge: This is a rest time, a Sabbath time, a time to reflect on the last week and get fueled up for another one, but even more than that to enjoy the present. We tend to have either all-day Saturday or Sunday to do this. We block out the day so that we don’t schedule anything that would be draining and we only allow life-giving activities. For us that means: going to church, taking a nap, going for a run or swim, reading a relaxing book, working on a creative project, having friends over for lunch or dinner… you get the idea. The point is: set aside an appointment on your calendar to recharge and reconnect with the Lord. He commands us to take a Sabbath rest, not only because He knows we need it, but because it helps us to remember that He is the One who makes the universe function, not us. We are just not that important (whew, praise God for that!!).
For those of you who are interested to hear more about our weekly points system, here’s a brief summary of what we do:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTrdL41_WWM&w=420&h=315]